Have you ever reacted to something in a way that felt totally disproportionate to what the moment called for?

A flood of emotion. A total shutdown. A snap response that even surprises you.
Yeah, me too. I thought I was crazy—other people may have thought so as well.

But guess what? I’m not crazy. And you probably aren’t either.
Chances are, it wasn’t your present-day self reacting—but a wounded part of you from long ago.

We live in a world that tells us to forget the past and move on.
To put on a happy face and be grateful—because someone else has it worse.
To make everything look good on the outside, hoping maybe it will feel that way on the inside.

Wouldn’t it be nice if it were really that simple?
Seriously, if we could just will ourselves into peace of mind and happiness, healthy relationships, and fulfilling lives, the world would be a better place, wouldn’t it?

And I’d be out of a profession.
Because we just can’t.

Why? It’s not your fault—it’s your childhood programming.

That’s where inner child healing comes in.

It’s not about blaming our parents or anyone else.
No, it’s not a criminal investigation to assign guilt.

It’s about understanding what happened, and what what happened did—then and now.
It’s about feeling feelings that were buried alive so they can finally heal.
It’s about understanding our “hard-wiring” so that we can change it.

Yes, the truth will set you free—but first, you have to know what lies are holding you hostage.

And when I say “hold you hostage,” I mean mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Feelings buried alive never die—so guess what?
Healing them means meeting those younger parts of you with the love, safety, and voice they never had.

No, you cannot change your past.
But you can transform your present—and create a brighter future.

What Is Inner Child Healing?

Inner child healing is the process of connecting with, nurturing, and bringing emotional healing to the younger parts of yourself that still carry pain and have internalized beliefs that rob you of true inner peace, happiness, and the freedom to be the you you were born to be.

These “inner children” are not imaginary friends. They are very real parts of you—living within your nervous system and memory—with physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual imprints. These imprints come from experiences of neglect, abuse, trauma, or simply growing up in chaos and confusion. They are not just memories; they’re embodied responses that still influence how you think, feel, and react today.

Even when your mind can’t recall the details, your body remembers.

The tension in your shoulders.
The lump in your throat.
Chronic headaches or fatigue with no clear medical cause.
Knots in your stomach.
That anxious urge to run, hide, or shut down.

It’s all evidence of a story your nervous system still holds.

If you’re like me, you’ve talked these memories to death.
You’ve journaled. You’ve read every self-help book out there.
You’ve prayed and meditated—maybe even felt forsaken by God… or stopped believing altogether.

You did the yoga.
You ate the veggies.
You would’ve stood on your head in the front yard if it would help!

And yet, you still feel stuck.

Why?  The body keeps the score,  Healing isn’t just mental—it’s somatic, spiritual, relational, and emotional.

When you begin this work, you open the door to:

• Recognizing your emotional triggers
• Realizing the behaviors that once helped you survive—but they no longer serve you in adulthood.
• Understanding there are no bad parts of you, only parts that need to be healed.
• Releasing destructive unconscious beliefs with authentic thoughts and feelings of self-love.
• Experiencing deep emotional healing and spiritual renewal—the kind you’ve been chasing through attention, approval, chocolate, new shoes, or so many spa days you’ve basically turned into silly putty.

Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you click and make a purchase, I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend resources I personally trust.

Why Inner Child Healing Matters

Unhealed wounds from childhood don’t stay in the past.

They quietly shape how we see ourselves, relate to others, and interpret the world around us.  They lead to triggers, emotional takeovers, and those unbalanced reactions to present-day situations that make no sense—to us or anyone else—leaving us wondering if we’re just plain crazy.

They influence how we love and attach…
How we handle stress and failure…how we handle success
How we experience joy—and whether we believe we deserve it.

In truth, every thought, feeling, and reaction is touched in some way by our early emotional programming.

But here’s the good news:
You can reparent those inner parts.
You can reprogram the patterns that once protected you but now hold you back.
You can heal from the bondage of hurt, shame, and emptiness that didn’t start with you—but can end with you.

 

Signs Your Inner Child Needs Healing

You may not realize that some of your adult struggles are rooted in a wounded inner child. But when certain emotional patterns keep repeating, it’s often a sign that younger parts of you are still hurting.

Here are some common signs:

• Chronic people-pleasing or fear of rejection
• Emotional outbursts that feel disproportionate to the situation
• Harsh self-criticism or perfectionism
• Difficulty setting or honoring boundaries
• Persistent anxiety, emotional numbness, or deep-rooted sadness
• Self-sabotaging habits, especially in relationships or goals
• Overachieving, paired with a constant need for validation or approval
• Intense fear of abandonment or not being “enough”
• Withdrawing from others or chronic isolation
• Repeating unwanted patterns—in relationships, finances, addiction, or self-worth

These aren’t personality flaws.
They’re coping mechanisms—rooted in unmet needs from long ago.

What Does Reparenting Yourself Mean?

Reparenting means learning to give yourself what you didn’t consistently receive as a child—things like unconditional love, safety, guidance, encouragement, structure and healthy discipline.
It’s the process of no longer abandoning yourself, but staying present and available in a way that is healthy, loving, grounded, and empowering.

How to Begin Inner Child Healing

You don’t need perfect conditions—or a deep dive into your past—to begin inner child healing.
It starts with a simple shift: treating yourself with curiosity and compassion instead of criticism.

Here are a few gentle ways to begin:

If you feel triggered:

When your emotional response feels bigger than the moment, it’s often your inner child calling out.

Ask yourself:
• What am I feeling—and where do I feel it in my body? Name thefeeling without judgement.
• What are the thoughts behind my thoughts?

(Slow down… listen to the internal dialogue.)

• When have I felt this way before?
  • “What would a loving version of me say or do in this moment?”
• What do I need right now?

Then, offer yourself what you didn’t receive. Try gentle affirmations like: (examples)
• “You didn’t deserve that, its ok to stand up for yourself and still be kind to others”
• “It’s okay to be nervous or afraid, things were scary then, but we’re safe now.”
• “You are not responsible for how other people feel and you don’t have to ignore yourself to accommodate them.  You are important too!”

This is reparenting in action—giving your inner child the love, safety, and reassurance they needed back then… and still need now.

Show up for yourself and create space to listen.

If you enjoy writing your thoughts down, spend some quiet time journaling. If not, don’t force it.

One powerful practice: write a letter to your inner child with your dominant hand, then let your younger self respond using your non-dominant hand. This simple exercise can help you access hidden emotions and insights.

If you’re drawn to nature, go for a walk and tune in to your inner dialogue. Are your thoughts kind? Encouraging? Or are they critical and harsh?
Here’s a good test: if you wouldn’t say it to a cherished friend, you probably shouldn’t say it to yourself.

If music speaks to you, play something that helps you connect with what you’re feeling—not to escape it, but to truly experience and honor it.

Do NOT go it alone!
Healing happens in relationship.

We weren’t meant to live in isolation—we learned to as a way to feel safe and in control.
But true healing requires connection.

Find safe people to talk to. A trauma-informed coach, therapist, or support group can help you feel seen, supported, and safe.

And just to emphasize it one more time:
Break the isolation.
You were never meant to do this alone.

 

Remember:

Inner child healing isn’t about blaming the past.
It’s about observing what happened… and understanding what it did to you then and how it affects you now.

Go slow. Go kind.
This work is sacred, and you don’t have to walk it alone. (did I mention that you should not do this by yourself? )

 

Final Thoughts: You Are Worth Healing

You are not broken.
You are carrying stories and strategies that once kept you safe.
And someday, your story will help someone else heal.  Your mess will be your message!

Inner child healing isn’t about fixing you—it’s about remembering who you truly are.
The real you beneath the fear, the masks, and the coping patterns.

When you deny your truth, you disconnect from your authentic self.
And when you’re not allowed to be who you really are,
you lose touch with the joy, freedom, and fullness of life.

That fear you feel now—the discomfort of facing your truth—
is the same suffocating feeling you experienced as a child.

Not allowing yourself to feel it now is a form of self-neglect—
a reflection of the neglect or abuse that once silenced you.

Stop doing that to yourself.
You deserve to feel.
You deserve to heal.
You deserve to be free.

Ready to Begin Your Journey?

I offer 1:1 coach-seling (a blend of coaching and counseling) for people who are ready to look within, reconnect with their inner child, and break free from the emotional patterns that keep them stuck.

If you’re craving clarity, healing, and true inner peace, you don’t have to walk this road alone.

 Your healing begins with a single brave yes—let’s talk to explore how we can work together
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